Dating after divorce consideration 1: Make sure that you are aware of your own level of self-confidence.
If are considering dating after divorce, be certain that you are either confident in yourself as a person or are at least aware of your level of self-confidence so you can plan accordingly. Self-confidence will help you to remain lucid when you’re dating after divorce. Choosing who to date and why you want to date them can be a major turning point in your emotional health after a divorce. If you’re self-confident, chances are good that you’ll be able to handle being rejected or ignored if you’re just beginning a relationship.
If you’re truly self-confident, you’ll be able to have the right mind set before you begin dating after divorce and any potential let down will be foreseen by you and “non-damaging” to your emotional state. Self confidence is perhaps the most important thing to think about from an emotional health perspective regarding dating after divorce.
Dating after divorce consideration 2: How quickly should you date after getting a divorce?
Fortunately, this is really only a question that you can answer, assuming your divorce is truly over with and you don’t have a custody battle that’s ongoing, a dispute about assets or finances, or any other type of lingering agreement that needs to be reached that could be impaired by dating. If you have children, this is a question of their strength and the strength of your relationship with them.
If you don’t have children, this decision is entirely up to you regarding how you’ll approach dating after divorce. Ask yourself how ready you really are to date again…depending on what you want out of dating after divorce, i.e., what the end result is to any solid dating relationship, will drive how quickly you date again. If you’re simply lonely and think you need to date again just for the sake of dating or to test how you’ll respond to dating, you may want to do a serious self evaluation regarding your confidence level. You will know when you’re ready again to begin dating after divorce – everyone’s different. Know yourself first, then make the decision.
Dating after divorce consideration 3: Should I date while going through a divorce?
Most coaches, attorneys, and counselors will tell you that dating while going through a divorce is never a good thing to do from a psychological perspective and a legal perspective. While this article isn’t a form of legal advice, common sense tells you that if you’re in any type of battle regarding marital assets or custody, avoid any dating.
From an emotional health perspective, dating while going through a divorce can be damaging to you and your “soon to be” ex-spouse. You’ll be much more mature after the divorce if you self evaluate to figure out how you contributed to the events that lead to your divorce. Handling yourself in a caring and sturdy emotional manner during a divorce can be an extremely difficult thing to do…but, it is a terrific growing and learning process. Make use of it! Grow as a person and learn about yourself, and you’ll be far better off after the divorce is final.
Dating after divorce consideration 4: Consider that you may have a tendency to date someone completely opposite from your spouse and realize that this isn’t healthy.
Dating after divorce is tricky! Be smart, realize that the pain you may have felt at the hands of your spouse can naturally lead you to want to date someone who is an opposite of your ex. It is a reasonable and natural reaction because you might want to avoid having any pain whatsoever or you may not want to deal with anyone who might remind you of your ex-spouse.